Allow me to introduce myself. I am the Sex Industry. You all know me from my best-selling products which have been produced in my factories in Hollywood, Nashville, Paris, Bangkok and several other lovely locations. My endorsements range from political elites, sports heroes, film/media personalities, music divas, that whole 50 shades of grey thing, and of course, the many tenured professors who endlessly sing my praise. The latter (though not exclusively, mind you) do not realize they are endorsing me, but since they are all into Darwin, Marx, and Dawkins they support me nonetheless; if they stopped teaching that man is merely the result of random chemical processes and therefore morality is relative to the individual my whole shtick would dissipate rather quickly.
But I digress!
Let me cut to the chase. I am big business . . . and I have a proposal for you. There are two stipulations to which you must agree. Should you agree to the terms I will compensate you handsomely . . . an annual salary of $57 billion to start with; however, projection models show that very likely that salary will rise quickly and sharply.
Here is all I require of you: first, you only need to give me your daughters and allow me to use them as merchandise. Secondly, let me use your sons as consumers of the merchandise you’ve given (formerly known as your daughters, but from here on, merely known as “wares”). I want your sons to consume these “wares,” for this is how I drive my whole business model! Daughters converted into wares, sons converted to consumers. Oh, and your sons have already indicated that they are very interested in this arrangement (though it converts them from being producers into consumers, or put another way changes them from men to beasts). Studies show that 80-90% of your college-aged sons are already converting to consumers, and some of your sons are converting as young as 11. It’s brilliant I know! Thus far you haven’t complained much about this arrangement, so I’m assuming your amenable to joining me in this little business deal? I can’t wait to hear back from you . . .
The Sex Industry
Since it would never say it quite like this . . . I thought I’d put some words in its mouth.
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