Introduction
This may be a bit of a public service announcement, but in this world there are difficult people. Such strained relationships are difficult to navigate. There are the wearisome conversations. There might be false accusations. There may be betrayals. There may even be a sense of danger, or a threat of violence. Such relationships may literally cause you to lose sleep. But this Psalm presents us with a case study in how we should deal with all variety of difficult people.
The Text
A Psalm of David, when he fled from Absalom his son. LORD, how are they increased that trouble me! many are they that rise up against me. Many there be which say of my soul, There is no help for him in God. Selah. But thou, O LORD, art a shield for me; my glory, and the lifter up of mine head. I cried unto the LORD with my voice, and he heard me out of his holy hill. Selah. I laid me down and slept; I awaked; for the LORD sustained me. I will not be afraid of ten thousands of people, that have set themselves against me round about. Arise, O LORD; save me, O my God: for thou hast smitten all mine enemies upon the cheek bone; thou hast broken the teeth of the ungodly. Salvation belongeth unto the LORD: thy blessing is upon thy people. Selah.
Psalm 3:1-8 KJV
Summary of the Text
The backdrop of this prayer is the rebellion of Absalom, a poignantly painful episode in David’s life. As David fled from Jerusalem he really was outnumbered. He had his family, his servants, and a troop of 600 Gittites (1 Sam. 27:2–3; 2 Sam. 15:18). Meanwhile, it seemed as if Absalom’s following had swelled to a great host; “the hearts of the men of Israel are after Absalom (2 Sam. 1513).” As David laid down to sleep that night, you can imagine his well-experienced martial mind drifting into military strategy. He had slain his tens of thousands, but as this prayer expresses, he is overwhelmed by the magnitude of his troublers (v1). But more severe than the mere multitude of enemies is their accusation (v2). They say that God won’t help him. Certainly, David, in his later years, had sinned badly. The Bathsheba incident had most certainly be a scandal. The rape of Absalom’s sister had also been shameful. It would be the easiest thing in the world for people to look at David with suspicion that the glory had bypassed him, the blessing had departed, God had abandoned him.
But David, in laying down to sleep confesses that the Lord is His shield. As he lay encamped in the wilderness, on the run from his own son, fearful that he might not make it through the night, he looks to God as a shield. Not only a shield, but also David’s glory, and the One who would lift his head (v3). David’s midnight cry is that though Jerusalem be overrun with David’s enemies, the ears of the Lord, who was seated in Jerusalem, were open to David’s pleas (v4, Cf. 2 Sam.15:25).
In this condition, surrounded by earthly enemies but securely trusting in the true King of Israel, he lies down to sleep (v5a). When he arises in the dawn, he rises with a joyful triumph. The enemies which concerned him in the dark of midnight are nowhere to be seen, and he takes this as a certain sign that since God saw him through the night, he need not fear the host that was hunting for him (vv5b-6).
In fact, in the clear light of dawn he takes heart that even in the worst case scenario, God hears him. Thus, he asks boldly for his enemies to be utterly embarrassed and brought down in shame (v7). Where does such confidence arise? Did David suddenly have more soldiers at his disposal? Did he get news that Absalom had retreated? Did his circumstance change at all? No. His confidence arose from the certainty that salvation belongs to the Lord, and thus blessing rests upon the Lord’s people (v8).
Difficult People
David faces a few sorts of enemies in this passage. First, and most obviously, he is dealing with a close family member who has not only betrayed him but is actively trying to take absolutely everything from him. David’s son was trying to kill him. That puts a real damper on a relationship. Second, he has numerous enemies who are simply following the herd; these enemies were once his subjects but who deserted him when the latest charismatic leader came through. Third are the enemies, like Shimei, who taunt David with his failures and insist that God has left him, accusing him of being a hopeless mess and a lost cause.
When someone close to you betrays you or is out to get you, the emotional pain is certainly deep. The nearness of the relationship makes the blade of betrayal sting all the more. It would be stunning to discover that Absalom is telling half-truths, cutting down your reputation, whispering to others how you have lost the plot, but he is all ears. With family and close friends we “let down our guard.” Thus, we might feel unshielded. But notice that David does not wallow in that pain. David simply acknowledges that God is his shield. The Psalms note elsewhere that though father and mother forsake us, the Lord will lift us up (Ps. 27:10). It would be naive to think, and yet we often make the assumption, that family ties are a shield against sorrow. But this is to put your trust in man, and not in God who is your shield. And what a shield of sovereign providence He is?
Now, consider the crowd of enemies. Crowds are fickle. Crowds may be behind you in fair weather, but against you in foul weather. The crowd who sang your praises one day, may want your head the next. Thus, you must never ground your faith on where the crowd stands. Be faithful to God, even if it means standing alone. Are you obedient to God simply because of the size of the crowd or because of the Bible’s instruction? Don’t bemoan the desertion. Instead, wake up, look around, and if the Lord has sustained you then don’t fret about the size of the enemy army.
In dealing with the false accusers you must remember that often there is enough truth in their accusation so as to sound plausible to both yourself and others. Nathan had prophesied that these things would happen to David; so, Shimei’s curses might, to the casual bystander, ring with truth. However, if you’ve confessed your sins in true repentance (as David plainly had done in Ps. 51), such accusations are like spider webs. When Satan accuses you of being a miserable sinner, say with John Newton, “But Christ is a great Savior.” Secondly, do not take the bait. Such accusations are only of use to make you flinch and cripple you with doubt, insecurity, and fear. Confess your sin, and stand up straight. Have you repented? Then whatever they say can’t be nearly as bad as what you already told the Lord about. Do you trust in Christ? Then there is all your hope and righteousness.
Praying for Broken Jaws
The language of verse 7 might make us blush a bit. Are we allowed to pray such things? But this is a prayer of true faith. It is imperative that in dealing with our foes we bear in mind that the judge of all the earth will do rightly. In the final judgement there will not be one injustice that sneaks past His discerning eye. There will be no backroom deals that escape His notice. Which means we ought to pray such things with a certain faith in the final judgement (A false witness shall not be unpunished, and he that speaketh lies shall not escape. … A false witness shall not be unpunished, and he that speaketh lies shall perish. … Judgments are prepared for scorners, and stripes for the back of fools. – Pro 19:5, 9, 29 KJV). This forces us to discern the face of Christ in this ancient prayer.
Christ in the Morning
There really are significant Christological pictures here. Christ, the son of David was surrounded by His enemies. He wept on the Mount of Olives, with enemies in pursuit. He lay down in His burial. But rose again in the morning. After His resurrection, He went forth to scatter all His enemies. He now has the rod of conquest in His hand. His enemies will soon feel the smart of His judgement upon their cheeks.
In other words, David’s prayer is prophetic. He sees that death and resurrection is how God will deal with His enemies. So why would you deal with your enemies any other way? In facing your own foes you must keep Christ’s resurrection in mind and imitate it in your dealings with those who are betraying you, forsaking you, slandering you, or accusing you. Do you have enemies? Die and rise. Go to sleep and awake in faith.
CHARGE & BENEDICTION
One of the most important, but most underrated, virtues is that of not caring what people think. Notice I didn’t say no caring about people, we are of course to love even our enemies. But in dealing with difficult people we all too often get trapped in a cycle of drama and difficulty simply because we care too much about what people think. And what is the cure for such self-centered thinking? Well…don’t you know, you died in Christ? So, live like you’re already dead. Dead people don’t care what people think about them.
Now may the God of peace who brought up our Lord Jesus from the dead, that great Shepherd of the sheep, through the blood of the everlasting covenant, make you complete in every good work to do His will, working in you what is well pleasing in His sight, through Jesus Christ, to whom be glory forever and ever. Amen.
Hebrews 13:20-21
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