Living Like a Christian

Sweep Up the Eggshells

July 9, 2020 By Ben Zornes Leave a Comment

One of the most distinguishing symptoms that a marriage has an infection of bitterness is that they have lost the ability to be playful. Instead, they bite and devour each other (Gal. 5:15). Every look is suspect. Every remark has a sharp edge to it. Every comment carries a sting. Every action is questioned. Every motive is suspected of nefariousness.

The eggshells cover every square inch of the marriage. Decisions about money, sex, the kids, work, in-laws, and what to have for supper are booby-trapped with trip wires which will set off another round of argument. And every argument is like a deep sea dredge which pulls up the rotting skeletons of unresolved offenses.

The insidious nature of social media, however, lets a couple post smiley, sunny pictures to keep up appearances; while the bitterness festers within the home like a boil in need of lancing. And again, there is no playfulness.

Now, I don’t mean that they never play Scrabble or Uno. I mean there is no laughing together, about each other, with each other, with no hint of animus. The fire of laughter can’t catch fire because everything is drenched in resentment. So they sit in the dripping rain of grumpiness, discontentment, and seething rage. There is no warmth between them. No shared jokes. No playfulness.

Solomon exhorts us to “Live joyfully with thy wife (Ecc. 9:9).” As well as to “rejoice in the wife of thy youth (Pro. 5:18).” The later passage is much more sexual in context (cf Pro. 5:19); however, a marriage in which sexual intercourse is in the context of a joyless, resentment filled marriage, is likely to be anything but a rejoicing in one’s wife. Solomon also demonstrates (in his famous love poem of Song of Songs) that lovers see each other everywhere and in everything from flocks of sheep, to towers, from pomegranates, to piles of wheat.

Paul teaches husbands to “love your wives, and be not bitter against them (Col. 3:19).” This could also be rendered as, “do not be a source of bitterness”; or don’t be embittering/exasperating.” This follows Paul telling wives to submit to their own husbands (Col. 3:18).

So if you are asking yourself “Where did all the joy and playfulness go in our marriage?” I’d bet that it is because the husband has been being an embittering lunkhead, and the wife has been a stubborn rebel. What should be done? If you are fed up with the eggshells, sweep them up by asking forgiveness for all your sins against your spouse. Which is why, I believe Paul precedes his instructions to wives and husbands (and then children and servants Col. 3:20-25) by insisting on forgiving and forbearance as the culture of Christian community (Col. 3:13).

When your conscience is clean, and your offenses are all forgiven or passed over, you can tease one another. Joke about how she leaves the cupboard doors open. Jest about how he forgot to put the slippers away again. Laugh at each other’s ridiculousnesses (I think that’s a new word I just invented). Rejoice in each other. Live joyfully with each other. Flirt with each other. Because your sins against each other are forgiven. Because your mistakes and forgotten chores are overlooked with forbearance and patience. You dance with each other while sweeping up the eggshells. You are playful, because you love her, and she respects you. The husband is a source of joy to the wife, and she is his glory and crown.

If that isn’t the case in your marriage, start with the eggshells right in front of you. Ask for forgiveness for today’s offenses, without demanding that your spouse grovel before you in return, or resenting them if they don’t seek forgiveness for their offenses against you. Give the gift of humble reconciliation.

Private Communion is Like Dry Water

March 18, 2020 By Ben Zornes Leave a Comment

Remember the Signs

As many churches and communities are heading into an uncertain period of quarantine, it is important that we keep our wits about us. As Aslan told Jill, “Remember the Signs.” Times like these fog the brain and we begin to do things that ought to be left undone. The authority of God’s Word is not suspended during these times. Rather, these moments should heighten our desire to seek the Lord, closely obey His Word, and teach the nations to do likewise.

The Supper of Our Lord

One way in which Christians mighty thoughtlessly go off the reservation is in regards to the Lord’s Supper. Practicing “private communion” either by yourself or with just your family might seem like a sensible way to continue to worship and honor the Lord, but is in fact a sort of oxymoron, or an inversion of the precise meaning of the meal. Remember that the sacrament of the Lord’s Supper is a sign of something, not just a nice tradition. It is meaningful bread and wine.

In other words, the meal is a sign of the Church’s union with Christ. We are commanded to “discern the body (1 Cor. 11:29).” I take this to mean that we are not only to see in the bread and wine the body and blood of Christ, but also we are to discern His body in the gathered saints.

An Inversion

Private communion inverts this. It takes a sign which represents the many-membered body of Christ and its union with our Head (whose body was broken and blood shed), and turns it into a sign of individualism. Furthermore, it neglects the proper ordering of Christ’s body, as it makes fathers (or individuals) into de facto elders in their own home. Christ is the Head of His church, and as such has ordered His church with various offices. Private communion is like telling the Lord with whom you are to be communing with that you really don’t bother about how He has established His church. You’ll do your own thang.

During these times, it is easy for various jurisdictions to get out of their lane. Your elders ought not to spank your children, so you ought not to do their job. Governors are not pastors so they shouldn’t excommunicate someone. Pastors are not senators, so they shouldn’t draft legislation.

Hodge On the Matter

Charles Hodge has a helpful point here regarding a relevant clause in the Westminster Confession of Faith (Chap. XXIX, Sec. III) which reads that the elders should “give both [bread and wine] to the communicants; but to none who are not then present in the congregation.”¹Acts 20:7. And upon the first day of the week, when the disciples came to- gether to break bread, Paul preached unto them, ready to depart on the morrow; and continued his speech until midnight. 1 Cor. 11:20. When ye come together there- fore into one place, this is not to eat the Lord’s supper
Here’s Hodge’s comment:

“It follows that it should not be sent to persons not present at the administration, nor administered by the officiating priest to himself alone. In particular cases, however, it may be administered in private houses, for the benefit of Christians long confined by sickness, provided that the officers and a sufficient number of the members of the Church be present to preserve the true character of the ordinance as a communion (Hodge’s Commentary pg. 362).”
Charles Hodge (Emphasis Mine)

In other words, we need to be mindful about the “true character” of the meal, while at the same time noting that there are exceptional cases (i.e. long confinement due to sickness). The key here is the remembering the “true character” of what we’re doing when we partake of the Lord’s Supper. We are eating a covenant meal. The Lord with His people. The minister is a representative of the Lord, and as such has authority to administer the sacrament. It isn’t meant for private devotion, it is meant for the community of believers.

Conclusion

If this quarantine were to last for a long time, Pastors and churches would need to make arrangements to have small gatherings of believers where the Word and Sacrament could be partaken. But the family is not a church to itself. It has its own jurisdiction, but it is not given the authority to act as an authorized representative of the Head of the Church (Christ) in regards to ecclesiastical matters. This isn’t because of some holy juju that the Pastors/elders have. Rather, we must recognize that Christ has ordered His church. He has set apart elders to be His authorized representatives in sacred matters. Fathers are assigned a different task.

So talking about private or family communion makes about as much sense as talking about dry water.

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Christmas All Year Round

December 25, 2019 By Ben Zornes Leave a Comment

I’m gonna keep this one short. You should be with your family and friends, eating a slab of fudge, or smoked brisket, or downing some mulled wine.

All I want to remind you of on this Christmas day, is that Christmas is a year round truth. Yes, the month-long crescendo which leads up to Christmas morning is a wonderful reminder of the long wait for Christ’s first advent, and the joy which geysered forth that first Christmas morning. It is a month which should be full of giddy excitement, anticipation, and gladness. God has come to make us His temple, His dwelling place. But Christmas isn’t just for December.

That first Christmas was when God planted the flag of conquest on the human race by taking for Himself a body. This means he intended to claim this planet for Himself. Christmas is a political event. Man’s kingdom––long ruled by the prince of darkness grim––has been overthrown, and is now ruled by a Man, like us, but One who died and overcame death and will never die. This Man is ruling at God’s right hand, for He came to bring the Kingdom of God. So remember, that this day is a reminder that Christ is King. Not in theory. Not in wish. Not in some esoterical “higher consciousness”.

No. Jesus Christ is King of planet earth. Now. The flag has been planted. The campaign of conquest marches on. And one day every knee will bow before Him, and every tongue will confess that truth. Which is why we, His people, ought to celebrate like crazy. So from my family to yours: have the holliest, jolliest, merriest Christmas, for Christ the Savior is born.

Hopes and Fears of All the Years

December 24, 2019 By Ben Zornes Leave a Comment

Years ago, the church I attended had an interim pastor, whose name I don’t remember, who was from Australia. That is unimportant to the story, but I mention it anyway. Free of charge. Anyway…he served through the Christmas season that year, and I recall that his Christmas Eve sermon lingered on that phase from the carol O Little Town of Bethlehem:

“The hopes and fears of all the years, are met in thee tonight.”

What a great line. In the tradition of the pastor from down under, I’d like to run over the implications of that phrase.

Think of those 4000 years from Eden to Bethlehem, from Adam to the Second Adam, from ruin to redemption. Right after the fall, we see Eve overjoyed that she has conceived a child, a seed, and she must have hoped that this was God’s fulfillment of His promise. But her hopes were soon disappointed as this first child became the like the serpent: a murderer.

Noah was a preacher of righteousness in the midst of a world dwelling in the macabre caverns of indescribable wickedness and corruption. So God overthrows the world, and in a sense, starts over with Noah. But soon the hopes of mankind being restored to Eden are dashed to pieces.

Mankind builds a tower to the heavens. God thwarts their purpose. God calls Abram out of the moon-worshippers of Ur; he believes God through all the windings of his sojourns.

Down through the ages, the story runs, and it seems like the coils of the serpent are inevitable. Egypt enslaves the people of God. But God delivers them. But they soon show that the serpent’s poison is in them. They rebel, they wander, they conquer the promised land, then they do what is right in their own eyes, and are like toddlers who so easily forget.

They offer bulls, goats, and sheep without number. They demand a king, rather than God being their king. God grants their request, and the king is possessed by an evil spirit. God gives them good king David, but despite his (and his son’s) reign being quite glorious, they both falter, sin, fail.

The hopes of the believing Israelite were often brought to the brink. At one point, there’s only one child left in the Davidic line. Over and over, their fears seem to grow large, while their hope seems to fail. But every time, God brings about an unexpected deliverance. Foreshadowing His greatest triumph.

Cain wasn’t the savior, nor Noah, Abraham, Moses, David, or Daniel. Through wanderings, exiles, slavery, idolatry, sin, triumphs, conquests, and defeats, God was bringing all the hopes and fears of His people to focus on a single point in history. After Malachi’s prophecy there were 400 years of prophetic silence. Their hope had grown dim, their fears had multiplied.

And then a cry is heard. A child was born. Mankind’s hope for salvation from sin had finally been answered. Mankind’s fear of damnation had finally been silenced. So look towards that little town of Bethlehem, where––two thousand winters ago––a child was born of virgin. In that manger is laid the bread of life from heaven. In that stable is the hope of all the earth. In that boy is the king who would conquer all our fears. Joy and peace had finally come to earth, and His name was called: Immanuel. God with us. In Him all your hopes find their answer, and all your fears are cast out, but His perfect love.

Grinnin’ & Singin’

December 23, 2019 By Ben Zornes Leave a Comment

The heavens are not silent. We know that night and day without ceasing the seraphim, those angelic creatures which surround the Lord’s throne, cry, “Holy, Holy, Holy.” Unbelieving scientists even recognize that the universe is a noisy place. The stars are buzzing and humming away at frequencies so diverse we need very precise instruments to catch the faintest hint of their song.

When the heavenly host came down to Bethlehem heralding the glad tidings of Christ’s birth, they invited mankind to join their chorus. The Son of God had come, and should man remain silent? The world, which had remained under the dark lord’s tyranny since the fall in Eden, was now invited to follow this Child-king as He conquered the Enemy and ushered in His kingdom of peace.

Now, when Christ died, rose again, and ascended to the Father’s right hand, it might seem to the unbelieving eye that nothing had changed. But, indeed, everything had changed. God had become a man, died in mankind’s place, overcame death, and ascended to the throne of the universe. The early church while retaining the Hebrew Psalter, also began to compose hymns of praise to Christ. It became a singularly feature of the Christian faith: we sing.

And our singing is our weaponry. We sing good news. We sing “born that man no more may die.” We sing, “He rules the world with truth and grace.” We sing, “O come let us adore Him, Christ the Lord.” We sing, “The kingdom of this world is become the Kingdom of our God and of His Christ.” We sing, “The hopes and fears of all the years are met in thee tonight.” We sing, “To free us all from Satan’s power when we were gone astray.” We sing, “Rejoice, rejoice.”

In other words, after all the shopping is done, after all the presents are wrapped, after the egg nog is poured in the mugs, after all the cookies are decorated, after the turkey is in the roaster, do not neglect to sing. After all, we have something to sing about. Sin is forgiven. Death is defeated. The works of the devil have been destroyed. The King of kings has come. He sits enthroned, swaying the scepter of the universe. Christians are to go about grinnin’ and singin’, telling all the world about this good news of man’s salvation in and through Christ.

So, sing, sing, sing. With big grins. Sing, and don’t worry about using your outdoor voices. Sing like men made free. Sing like men who will live forever in glory. Sing like those know that death has no sting. Sing, because the dragon is cast down. Sing, because Christ was born in Bethlehem. Sing, because Christ is King of kings, Lord of lords, and we are His people. Hallelujah, indeed.

Christmas IS for Fussers (Part 2)

December 22, 2019 By Ben Zornes Leave a Comment

Yesterday I said, “Christmas ain’t for fussers.” But––as Reb Tevye would say––“on the other hand,” Christmas is for fussers. We are a discontented race. We envy, covet, lust, gripe, murmur, dispute, wrangle, tangle, and war. If we have plenty, we are still dissatisfied that we don’t have their stuff. If we don’t have much at all, we’re despondent that the “1% are keeping us down.” But, Christmas is the offer of salvation from all our twisted up malcontent.

We wanted to be as God, and so we grabbed the fruit before the Lord’s appointed time. The history of lost humanity is one long tale of us hating God and hating our brother. We hate God because His holiness offends our grimy-grey morality. We hate our brother because he won’t fall down and worship us. We are a miserable wreck.

But Christmas comes. And it’s message is that Christ humbled himself (Phi. 2:7-8). The Lord if Glory came down into the garbage dump of the cosmos, laid hold of the dead corpse of humankind, and took it upon Himself, died the just death which was coming for us, all that He might resurrect you and me to share in His eternal glory which he had with the Father and the Spirit before all worlds.

It is this humility which is both our salvation and our example. He became one of us, that He might save us from our gripes and hatreds and sins. Then He show us the way to be truly human. Christmas is for the fussiest of fussers. The grinchiest of grinches. The scroogiest of scrooges.

This great mercy is why His name is the name which will be upon every tongue, and to which every knee will bow (Phi. 2:10-11). So we see in the Christ-child both the one who will pay the death-price for our sin, and the one who will show us the way out of the prison of our sin. The cost of our sin was the humiliating death of Christ. The way out of our sin is the humility of Christ. So all fussers come to the Christ child, and fuss no more. Instead, let your knees bend low, let your tongue sing loud:

Hail the heav’n born Prince of Peace, hail the Son of righteousness
Light and life to all He brings, risen with healing in His wings
Mild He lays His glory by, born that man no more may die
Born to raise the sons of earth, born to give them second birth
Charles Wesley

Christmas Ain’t for Fussers (Part 1)

December 21, 2019 By Ben Zornes Leave a Comment

We must all admit that we’ve had at least one displeasing Christmas present. Perhaps it was the wrong size, color, shape, brand, or age level. Someone just mentioned that their boyfriend’s mother bought her a giant rubber ducky for Christmas last year. She was 26 years old. It wasn’t a gag-gift. Once, my sister, being quite young, opened a Christmas present from our Grandma. It was a set of clothes. To which my sister memorably replied, “Clothes. Boring.” And tossed them aside.

Of course, we’ve all probably groaned or grumbled or fussed about some gift we’ve been given. We like to think that we left all the grumbling behind us in our childhood. But zooming out we can see that we adults are just more discrete in our fussing. Some families dread Christmas because it ain’t a slice of peace on earth, more like World War 3. So and so doesn’t want some other relative around because their feuding. The adult kids are with the other parents this year. Mom and dad can hardly wait for school to start again. That sort of thing.

But we also can fuss in very spiritual looking ways. “Look at all this materialism.” “Christmas has pagan roots.” “This is all so over the top.” Or the sanctimonious, “I aim to be generous all year round.”

But Scripture forbids––in all its forms––fussing: “Do all things without murmurings and disputings (Phl. 2:14).” The greek word for murmurings is hilariously transliterated as “goggysmos.” What an onomatopoeia! Goggysmos means an inner secret debate. Like those arguments in your head that you always win, looking (in your mind’s eye) like a renowned rhetorician from ancient Greece.

So, regardless of your age, regardless of the gift, regardless of the season, be thankful. No fussing. Christmas ain’t for fussers. No fussing for children, and no fussing for the big people. Gratitude is the context in which Paul prohibits murmuring and disputing. Christ’s sacrificial humility (Phi. 2:5-11) is the mindset which we’re to have. In other words, Christ’s Incarnation, Crucifixion, and Resurrection should bring us up short if ever we’re tempted to fuss.

Materialism is an Orc

December 20, 2019 By Ben Zornes Leave a Comment

Christmas is a battle between two world-views. On one side, like an uncircumcised Philistine, stands Materialism. On the other, the armies of the Living God, shaking in their boots despite the fact that God has come in the flesh. Materialism is like an Orc, it is a twisted version of something beautiful. That something is the Incarnation. And the Armies of Israel should defy the giant, and sling a stone at his forehead.

For decades now, we’ve been told that the universe is governed by cold, brute “forces”, which the scientists like to call laws. Gravity. Chemical processes. Ecosystems. Nuclear fission. Second law of thermodynamics. “All that we see and touch can be explained,” so the white lab coats tell us. But then they wax eloquent about the beauty and glory of mathematical formulas, the boundlessness of space, the wonder of the animal spirit, and the mysteries of physics.

But the Materialist has no basis to call anything good, beautiful, or even true. If matter is all there is, then nothing actually matters. Our emotions are identical with a shook up can of Dr. Pepper.

However, this Goliath of our day has a smooth stone coming for his brow. That stone is the announcement which took place in Bethlehem 2000 years ago. There it was told to a virgin that she would bear a Son, miraculously, and this child would be a true human child, but whose origin was from eternity. His name would be Immanuel, God with us. In other words, the transcendent God drew so near to us that we could see, hear, and touch Him. The Incarnation is a big fancy word that we use to describe what took place when God became a man. Jesus did not cease to be God, nor did he ever become God. He was God. But God now had a material body.

Which means that the matter of this world was now joined to God not only in a relationship of Creator/created, but by a Redeemer/redeemed relationship. God had come to save the world, and redeem it from the curse. Man’s salvation has implications for the whole material world. It groans, we are told, for the adoption, “the redemption of our body (Rom. 8:23).”

The Materialist believes that stuff is all there is, and ends up with nothing. It can’t explain beauty, joy, glory, or goodness. But the Incarnation bridges the divide between God and man, Creator and creature. Now, in Christ, our body and soul is promised resurrection. Our final state is not one of disembodied ghoulishness. No, we will eat, drink, laugh, play, in a material world which will have been resurrected to glory.

So, Christmas is a celebration of the Incarnation, which means we should not just give each other the ethereal “Christmas Spirit.” We should give each other stuff. Things. Molecules of matter. God gave us Himself, wrapped in human clay, in order to redeem the whole created world. So smoke a pork shoulder, give diamond earrings, snuggle under a fleece blanket with piping hot chocolate, sing with vocal cords, lift up holy hands in praise, and enjoy the blessings which God has filled this world with and redeemed by His own blood.